Marital Second Chances
This morning I got up at the normal 5 am to let the dogs out of their crates to go outside and go potty. As I was doing so I thought of Shawn’s and my marriage. I was thinking that we have a pretty easy marriage. Easier compared to a lot out there. It is of course in no way shape or form perfect, or filled solely with sunshine and bubble gum. But it’s good. Even great at times.
I just read a headline regarding the Jesse James/Sandra Bullock breakup. He was being quoted that “He threw his marriage away.” I was like yeah. You did.
For some reason most couples in which one spouse had an affair, refuse to reconcile. This is of course especially evident with celebrities. Whether the spouse who cheated apologizes or not, the marriage is over and the family is left in ruins. Neither party is willing to try again, to repent, and do what it takes to make the marriage work a second time.
Over the past few months I’ve seen how God can begin to heal and cause reconciliation in affair ridden marriages. Couples who have come out on the better side, working vigorously with God’s help to make their marriage work a second time.
Chad & Sarah Markley are one of those couples. Sarah was one of the first people whose story I read. Chad and Sarah have taken great measures to insure the safety of their marriage. Click the link on Sarah’s name and watch the video. Listen to what they have to say has a couple, five and a half years after she admitted her affair.
Seth & Amber Haines. Amber’s story was the first one I read. Amber’s words blew me away that God can reconcile broken marriages.
Brian & Jenni Clayville. I’ve only somewhat recently become familiar with Jenni’s story. Jenni had been in an affair for two years when she finally came clean, yet she and Brian are an amazing testimony to God’s healing. On February 11, Brian re-proposed to Jenni and tomorrow in front of family & friends that have come as far as Australia will renew their vows.
God never intended for husband and wife to separate. These couples marriages have spoken volumes to me. God can and does heal marriages. If only more people would realize that. If only more people would put aside their pride and apologize (repent) and forgive.
The last thing I want to share is something that Chad said in the video. He said that their secret was “they were willing to do whatever it took to make it work.” That is key to every marriage not just ones that are rebounding from an affair. Marriage takes work, but it’s worth every bit of work.
Marriage definitely has it’s valley moments. Just the other day Wes and I were talking of all that God has miraculously brought us through… it’s been hard, painful, and tough. Many times we could have threw in the towel, but we know that marriage is yet another way we can glorify our God. It is important to stay on guard in protecting your union. We know we have a real enemy wanting to destroy us and all that God has built.
these marriage stories have powerfully impacted me too… watching other couples fight it through to the good stuff…so many people have anniversaries this week – celebrating 10 years, 7 years, 9 years, 2 or 3 years… John and I celebrate 1 year on Sunday. To read the stories of other folks like y’all who have made it ministers to me in a way that is incredible… God is so good
Happy Anniversary my friend. I know he’ll be out of town but celebrate when he gets back. Love you guys.
Aren’t those stories amazing?! My husband and I have been married 11 years tomorrow, and we have had some HARD TIMES, let me tell you. But God is good and has blessed us beyond anything we ever imagined or could deserve. The Markleys, Clayvilles and Haines are incredible, and their stories have changed my understand of love forever.
P.S. I came over to read and chat after seeing that you might take a trip to visit Sara (Gitz)! How exciting – I hope you get to go!
They are incredible stories. Hope I get to go too. Thanks for stopping in.
Thanks for highlighting marriages that can be restored …. I’ve ‘only’ had emotional affairs – nothing physical…. but my wife is at the stage (because of my long time before I could come to a place of wanting to save our marriage) of not caring anymore. The last year has been very very painful, and I’m praying that God softens her heart towards me and helps us both in this….
I’ve read some of the stories you mentioned…. I pray that mine is the same…..
I’m praying for your marriage.
Thank u, Prudy …. pray that I will want what I should want, and not want what I shouldn’t want – if you get what I’m saying….
You know I am.
Thanks for this post! I found you through Shaun Groves blog.
My marriage of 12 years is one that has been restored by God! I had an affair on my husband 6 years ago. It isn’t easy by any measure, most times it feels like being dragged through gravel for him and for me – watching and knowing what I did to him!
However, through all of that, I praise the Lord that our marriage is stronger and sweeter today than it ever has been! A three strand cord is not easily broken and now God is the thrid strand in our cord!
Misty, thanks for visiting. I’m in awe of healing God does in marriages. I wish more people got that. So happy to hear he restored your marriage.