Hi all. A short (kinda long) video just sharing about the last month and a half. I hope you all had a wonderful Easter celebrating Jesus and the salvation His death provided us.
I filmed this last night after we got home from church. After I was done I remembered other things I’d written out in my head days ago that flitted away and didn’t make it in to the video. Even now after remembering them they are gone.
A controversial radio talk show host is murdered in his studio. Fears arise as the city goes on alert for a possible terrorist attack.
In the much anticipated sequel to Liz Wiehl and April Henry’s book Face of Betrayal, the Triple Threat team of Federal Prosecutor Allison Pierce, FBI Special Agent Nicole Hodges, and TV crime reporter Cassidy Shaw once again join forces to solve the murder of Jim Fate in Hand of Fate.
As these ladies whose bond is held together by a friendship from high school and ultimate chocolate desserts work to solve the crime they each encounter their own struggles and hurdles to overcome.
I found Hand of Fate to be quick read. I read nearly half the book in a sitting one evening. The stories of these women and the mystery at hand solidly held my attention. I related to my husband that I liked that it was neutral politically. Leaning neither to far to the right or left. Each side was able to have their say. Christian themes are through out but not over powering or in your face. It was insightful to read how each character dealt with the obstacle/trial in their life with whether they were a Christian or not. Especially know even as Christians our response isn’t necessarily how in a “perfect” book world they might.
This is the first book I’ve read by Ms. Wiehl and look forward to going back and reading Face of Betrayal now.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
My heart is always torn when I think about the sacrifice Christ made on the cross. If I’m going to be honest it can be difficult at times to accept that He loves me and wanted fellowship & reconciliation with me so much that He endured a shameful, excruciating death. The nails and thorns and bones and rocks and leather that pierced His unmarred, blemish free flesh was done for the sanctification and redemption of you and I.
On that dark, gruesome day of Passover as the blood of sheep and goats was spilled over the altar in the temple, Genesis 3:15 was fulfilled. Victory was tasted as the angels danced for joy in Heaven.
This was a bulletin Shawn did for Easter a few years ago. It is one of my all time favorite things he’s designed. Hope your Easter is not only fun and blessed, but also filled with introspect of Christ’s sacrifice for you.
I also recommend reading/checking out this post by Alece over at Grit and Glory.
Today I received news that we’d been waiting to arrive since the beginning of the year. My Granny (mom’s mom) was diagnosed with a second round of Lymphoma late last year. She’d been in remission for about three years. In January her oncologist and my mom decided to stop chemo. Really over the last month her health has gotten worse. My mom believes she may have had a small stroke which didn’t help matters.
We’d been praying that God would take her and cease her suffering. She’d grown delusional and her internal clock was backwards, thinking it was evening in the morning and vice versa. She’d stopped eating, and was was receiving Morphine & Adivan (anti-anxiety) every two hours. Yesterday she was transferred to hospice.
She was often insufferable. She’d call when we were little and lecture us on money and sex. But she loved.
She was very legalistic in her Christian faith. She’d ask everyone if they knew Jesus. Even though she may not have been tactful in witnessing she cared more about the souls of the lost than most Christians.
In the last nine years she gained three great grandsons, a granddaughter-in-law and a grandson-in-law.
Today she saw Jesus face-to-face. She worships at His feet.
On Sunday as we celebrate the resurrection of our most magnificent Savior she will celebrate with Him. I can’t think of a better way to celebrate Easter.
Yesterday was the first day in four months that I wore a normal shoe without arch supports in my left shoe or an orthodic boot.
I’ve learned a few things about walking in the last few months.
Sometimes, it takes patience.
Sometimes, it’s painful.
Sometimes, you need a little help.
In the past week and pretty much the last few months I keep turning over and over in my head not walking in fear. Conversations with Shawn, blog posts other people have posted. It keeps coming back like a little bouncy ball.
I’m learning that I’m not as acceptable to change as I thought I was. Maybe it’s the skeptic that has grown in me since marrying a pessimist. I obviously don’t want to walk in fear. We are commanded not to fear.
Fear is not only immobilizing but can be convoluted also. What we chalk up to “waiting on God” in many cases is fear. Fear to take a step into the unknown. Fear of leaving our comfort zone.
When we walk in fear we do not walk in joy or faith. We are relying on ourselves and our ability to discern a situation. We cannot grow when we walk in fear.
To walk justly and in mercy. To trust my steps to be ordained by Him. Placing my cares, fears, worries, troubles, late night wonderments at His feet.
Learning to not walk in fear is part of our sanctification. That road is is not always easy, but it must be walked.
One of our neighbors recently acquired a dog.
This dog…likes to bark.
A lot!!!
Last night said dog started barking about 10 PM. I was able to fall asleep but was woken up at 2 AM to barking – which I could hear through my ear plugs. The dog continued to bark for the next two hours. **sigh** Yeah. We called the police but apparently here in Phoenix Animal Control handles these situations and they apparently have no one on duty at 3 in the morning (imagine that…sleeping at 3 AM.)
In the midst of all this lack of sleep I couldn’t help but think of this bit by comedian Brian Regan, and how at the time it was SO not funny. Bad words may have been uttered from my lips.
Shawn and I discussed this morning that we think the owner has started working nights, because any considerate, person in their right mind would have yelled at the dog and gotten them to stop barking. If we can figure out which neighbor I’m considering going over and politely letting him know his dog is barking all night and can he do something about it. Praying for sleep tonight.
I’ve worn glasses since I was in the first or second grade. Big, thick glasses. Lenses that faded from dark to light depending on if I was in the sun. Lenses with tri-color tinting cause in 1983 that was as cool as the perm my dad had. The summer I turned 10 I had to start wearing contacts. Hard ones. I vividly remember taking them out for swim lessons at the city pool and then putting them back in. The little pink zip pouch I kept my case and solution in.
I’m reminded of this every morning. I wear a watch to bed so in the first light of morning I can squint at it to see the time. I’m reminded every time I get lent, dust, eye goobers under my contacts. I’m reminded of this every time I have to get an inch away from something to see it without my glasses or contacts.
My sister-in-law, Brie, works for a lasik center and is always nagging me that I should get lasik. I’ve considered, seriously at times. But a couple things always keep me from doing so. One of those is fear. My eyesight is already bad, if something goes wrong I’m seriously screwed. Oh and even if your eyeball is “asleep” your brain still knows what’s going on.
I have another more important reason for not doing it. More important to me. I just believe it is something I’m not supposed to do. I’ve not been able to see as long as I can remember. I can’t recall any moment in my life where I could see without the aid of glasses or contacts – well maybe that day in Kindergarten where a classmate stole my milk money.
…and that is why I refuse. One day I will blink, I will open my eyes first thing in the morning, I will open my eyes from prayer and the first thing I see without the use of outside sources will be the face of my Savior. I will have healing. I’m excited for that day.
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There are somethings though, I refuse to be blind to anymore. The hurting. Those in poverty. The outcast. They say ignorance is bliss, but I don’t want to be blissful when it comes to the things that break God’s heart. I want to be broken with eyes wide open.
I want to cry.
I want to see.
I don’t want to be ignorant.
And as a friend reminded me just now, I don’t want to forget.
I was dealing with some discouragement and envy a week or so ago. Thanks to this post by blogger Mandy Steward which Shawn turned me onto. Which lead me to other bloggers she mentioned in the post. Which lead me to saying this to him, “Geeze I suck.” Which lead Shawn to ask why I would say that. My reply? “Because I’m not creative and I’m surrounded by creative people.”
I really don’t think that I’m creative. I think that I get random bursts of creativity. I create a funky piece of jewelery or create a really cool looking card. These bursts are rare. I sit around in the background watching others create masterpieces not to mention my amazingly creative, hot husband create things out of nothing.
So in the midst of my discouragement and envy I decided to take a giant step. Do something I’d never done before. At lunch I found myself deliberately in the canvas and paint aisles at Michael’s. I had a small budget since we’re waiting on Shawn’s payday but I came home with a few things.
I actually really enjoyed painting. I’m no Monet, Picasso, or even Mandy Steward but I tried. I found something new I liked doing. Here is the final product. I even Modge Podged a photo of us to the canvas.
I don’t take compliments well. I don’t know why, I just don’t. Which is weird since my Love Language is Affirmation. I don’t know how to respond when complimented. I feel…………weird.
My husband is my greatest fan and the major source of all compliments. He makes me feel loved (see previous paragraph mentioning love language). Shawn leaves for work before I do and is home before I am. In other words there are 10 hours of the day he doesn’t see me. He sees me at the end of the day with worn makeup, flat hair where it’s supposed to be poofy, rumpled clothes. He finds me beautiful. In that moment.
Today (Monday) was one of those days. I was satisfied (settled) with what I’d chosen to wear – which as ladies know can mean going through your entire wardrobe twice before finding something – my skirt probably could have stood to be ironed and my bangs hidden forehead could have definitely been less oily. Yet, Shawn’s response when seeing me was that “I looked good” (husband speak for beautiful).
Shawn’s favorite word for me is fancy. To him everything I do is fancy. I joke with him that I could be in a gunny sack and he’d still think I was fancy.
I may never be able to take compliments, and never think of myself as fancy, but he does and that makes all the difference in the world and makes me feel loved and beautiful.
So I’m learning about self control today. Self control touches so many areas of our life. Everything from not eating the entire bowl of Peanut M&M’s (in my defense the bowl was no where near even being a quarter full) to not flipping off your computer monitor when you get an email that makes you mad (just being honest and transparent here).
I’m seeing a natural progression in my lack of self control. It goes a little something like this (fast forward past the fall of man and the fact that even as Christians we all still struggle with the sin nature):
I really don’t like being like this. (Of course does anyone really?) The road to sanctification is not easy. I am grateful the Lord wants to dredge out the nasty business in my life.
