Champagne Wishes & Caviar Dreams

I don’t play the lottery or gamble.  I prefer to keep what little money I have rather than to lose it to a game of chance.  But I wonder at times just what would I do if I did ever win a huge lottery jackpot.

I just watched this video of a couple in LA who won $266M.  Yes 266 followed by six zeros.  What made me watch it was the tagline that she is not going to quit her job.

$266M lottery winner ‘just kept working’
$266M lottery winner ‘just kept working’

So…

You’ve just hit the jackpot.  How are you going to spend, invest your millions of dollars?  Pay off debt?  Buy a car?  House?  RV?  Island?  Are you going to donate to a charity?  Will you quit your job or keep working or go work somewhere that doesn’t pay much specifically for the joy of it?

Me?

I’d keep working.  Or go work at some place like Starbucks or a non-profit where it really didn’t matter what I made.  I’d like to say I’d be super-spiritual and automatically give 10% to my church, and hopefully I would.  I’d pay off my house and my car, but I don’t think that I’d run out and buy new ones.  My little Corolla works just dandy and my house is sufficient for our needs.  I’d help our families pay off their homes.  I’d use some for some dreams Shawn and I have and rest in the fact that we don’t have to save and save and scrounge up the money.  I’d give a large, anonymous donation to Compassion and sponsor more kids.  And I’d invest.  I’d basically continuing living in the means I’m in now.  (at least I hope I would)

You’re turn:

Use Caution While Listening When Driving

Saturday Shawn and I met my family up at the Grand Canyon for a little family time and to honor my Granny.  It is a three hour drive for us and Shawn asked if I’d mind listening to Jon Acuff‘s Stuff Christians Like.  I said sure.

I didn’t realize that over the next 6 or so hours (there & back) I would laugh so hard.  Jon is hilarious with his little quips, his wittiness, but also extremely thought-provoking thoughts.  I drove on the way up north and there were times I literally wanted to bang my head on the steering wheel I was laughing so hard.  Don’t worry I kept my eyes on the road and my head off the steering wheel.

If you haven’t checked out the book or the audio book do it.

I was not asked by Jonathan Acuff, Zondervan, or any other entity to review this book.  I did not, will not receive anything from this review.

April.30.2009

I know that certain dates can change your life.  Your wedding day.  The day your child is born.  The day you get that job.  However, I didn’t realize on the evening of April 30, 2009 that this date would forever change my life.

It rocketed my perspective and my desires to a completely other place than they’d ever been before.

More specifically, it took my heart and shipped it to a slum outside Nagpur, India.

On April 30, 2009 Shawn and I decided to sponsor our first child through Compassion due largely in part because of this Bloggers Trip (Anne‘s posts had my crying like a slobbering fool).  We always say that sponsoring her was one of the best decisions we’ve ever made.  And we’re completely serious.  I didn’t think that sponsoring Nikita would change my life, I thought we’d change hers.  Provide her nutritious meals, schooling, health checkups, etc.  But she’s changed ours in so many ways.  They way we are choosing to live our lives.  What we find important.

Sponsoring her has made me fall in love with India.  Praying that God would redeem and save India.  That He would break apart the hierarchy of the caste system and open the eyes of the leaders to the poor dying outside their major cities.

I can’t believe she’s been apart of our lives for a year already.  We do our best to write her often and send gifts.  I want her to be the little girl that always gets something from her sponsors.

I pray for her salvation and that of her parents and two sisters and brother.  This is hugely important to me.

I wear this ring as a reminder of her.  To pray for her and her family and her friends.

She is as much part of our family as our own child would be.  Even across thousands of miles.

As part of celebrating we sent her some special gifts.

A card, a little wallet size card that reminds her she’s special, Disney Princess stickers, My Little Pony coloring pages, monkey finger puppets I found in the Target Dollar Spot, and a beautiful prayer Shawn wrote for her.

We celebrate this day with great joy and pray that we will continue to celebrate for many, many years.

Happy anniversary our dear Nikita.

Hunted

A few weeks ago Shawn and I started watching a fantastic DVD series called Planet Earth.  It contains amazing photography and video footage of…well…earth.  Though the science behind it is of course evolution when talking about how long the earth had been around, but I have been completely humbled by the awesomeness of our creator.

As with most nature documentaries the “circle of life” was brought up and enter from backstage African Hunting Dogs hunting Impalas.  The Dogs stayed hidden, spying their prey, inching closer and closer till the most opportune time to strike.  They attacked the unsuspecting prey which of course ran for dear life.

Photo Credit

Photo Credit

The narrator explains that the African Hunting Dogs are the most efficient hunters in Africa, working as a team seeking to destroy.  Each dog breaking off simply to surround the hunted.

In the video the Impala’s only saving grace was jumping into a lake treading water while the African Hunting Dogs waited and then left to go sup on an Impala whose fortune was not so good.

As I watched this I could help but think of my own life.  I’m just sitting here minding my own business when out of no where I’m attacked.  And I’m running.

But where am I running.

What am I looking to, to be my saving grace?  Friends?  My husband?  A glass of wine?

I have noticed over the last couple weeks that when I ran to God, ran to His Word my attitude, my unbridled tongue got better.  The moment I stopped engulfing myself in the wisdom of the Bible and the teachings reminding me that my tongue is like the fires of Hell my attitude started going bad again.

I’m learning where to run.  To continuously allow myself to be engulfed by the Word of God.

Randomly Me

I often struggle with the fact that I don’t blog everyday.  Some part of me thinks I should.  I mean everyone else does.  I think part of the reason I don’t write everyday is I want to share my heart with you.  I’m grateful that you guys pop over here for a couple minutes to read something I think is worthy of going on the internets.

Jenny over at JennyRain is having a fluffer-nutter week.  It’s like marshmallow fluff minus the stickies.

I decided since today is Friday I’d do a fluffy little number.  In an order to allow you to get to know me a little bit here are some random things about me:

♦  I was born in Southern California.  We moved to Arizona when I was three for a number of reasons: 1. My health, 2. Dad lost his job, & 3. The landlord of our apartment kicked us out so he could give the apt. to his daughter.

♦  I grew up in a town of 500.

♦  When I was 14 we moved to a town of probably less than 8,000 at the time.

♦  I love the big city.  It would literally take God moving me back to a small city for me to consider ever living in one again.

♦  I graduated from college with my Associate of Arts in 1995.  I was the first female in my family to do so.

♦  I wanted to be a lot of things when I grew up including but not limited to a teacher, mom, nurse, model (which I did for a few years. I like eating & not exercising so that doesn’t work well for me), and a journalist.

♦  I was planning to get my BA in Journalism, but God closed that door.  I miss writing and this blog has given me a love again for it.

♦  I’m a fairly picky eater and do not eat  onions, mushrooms, anything that lives under water, cabbage, & more; but I love things most don’t….like beets.

♦  I have one brother, Joshua.  He’s married to Jennifer.

♦  I have two brothers-in-law and three sisters-in-law:  Collin & Brie; Ryan & Nina; Jenn (mentioned above).

♦  I have six (yes six) nephews:  Jacob, Caleb, Dade, Cole, Deacon, & Malachai.  No neices (yet).

♦  I have really only one vice and that is coffee.  I usually only drink decaf (insert astonished gasps here).  I really just like coffee no matter the caffeine content.

♦  I’ve been married for nearly nine years.

♦  I grew up believing that I’d accepted Jesus when I was around five.  However, when I was 16 I started having doubts if I really had.  I wanted to make sure.  So at 16 I made sure.

♦  My favorite color is green.  All shades except army green, it’s not as favorite.

♦  My favorite animal is the frog.

♦  We have two Chihuahus:  Lengua & Zeus

♦  I love funky shoes & tights.  I miss wearing heels from my surgery.  Hopefully one day again.  That or I’ll be selling the ones I own. :(

♦  Until I was about high school age I refused to make the dip (bowl) in my mashed potatoes for my gravy.  I remember saying for sanitary reasons.  One day I just up and changed.  Don’t know why.

♦  Love (l-o-v-e) dark chocolate.  Peanut and peanut butter M&M’s.

♦  Love marshmallows & things associated with marshmallows (i.e., Peeps, rice krispie bars, s’mors, etc.)

Well I think that is enough fluff for now.  Hope you have a Happy Friday! :)

Not Losing Hope Over No

I’ve been sleeping weird lately.  I’ve battled issues with insomnia for years and when I do sleep I toss and turn all night.  I rarely get restful sleep.  The past few nights I’ve been sleeping lightly and having weird dreams I can’t remember.

As I was lying in bed last night I just prayed that God would allow me to get some sleep, restful sleep.

He didn’t allow that to happen.

Sometimes when God says no to a prayer request it’s easy to get and understand why God probably said no.  In others like asking for sleep I just don’t get it.

My prayers last night just didn’t consist of me and my sleep.  God brought a continuous flow of people to mind to pray for as I awaited the bliss of dreamland.

Alece – Alece is just going through a lot of crap.  Her Thrive Africa center in South Africa was hit by a tornado.  She’s dealing with the chance of having to let her SA Nationals go that work at Thrive due to lack of funding.  All on top of the personal stuff she’s trying to deal with.

Jenny – Jenny’s come to be a great friend over Twitter & blogging the last month or so.  She and her husband John are leaving for Burundi in a couple weeks.

Anne – Anne is a world traveler extraordinaire and speaking guru.  Since January she’s been to Haiti, Moldova, and Russia serving and ministering and learning.  During her trip to Moldova & Russia she got sick.  Quite sick.  A sick that sent her home early on a jet plane.  Getting home to find out she had a Mono virus.  She has spent the last couple weeks resting at home with her husband & kitties and yesterday boarded a plane to speak at Catalyst West Coast.  This woman is like the Energizer Bunny. :)

Kelli – Kelli got a new job yesterday.  Which is exciting.  She has two precious (and sometimes precocious) children.  Last year they moved from Michigan to Southern California {can you say culture shock??}.

Crystal – I’ve only started following Crystal on Twitter fairly recently.  She’s seven years sober from a porn addiction.  This week she started tackling another addiction – food.  God just really laid on my heart that she would seek Him and find her sustenance in Him rather than food.

Just because for some reason God didn’t allow my body to get the sleep I would have liked doesn’t mean He didn’t hear my pray or that for the women above.  He hears and answer’s accordingly.  I refuse to lose hope just because I didn’t get an answer to prayer I would have liked.

A Lot Like Him

I’m a lot more like him than I thought I was.  Just a short while ago I caught myself laughing the exact way he laughs.  In some ways I wish I was more like him.

Him……is my brother.  My younger by 22 months, 20 days brother.

I didn’t always like him.  We fought growing up.  A lot.  Oh sure I loved him the way a sister always loves her brother.  You mess with him you mess with me.

There were the times he’d hit me in the back just because he was my brother.  He always called me hucky puck, made fun of me, and spent way to much time in the bathroom (hiding from doing the dishes on his night).

He’s grown up a lot since then.

And so have I.

Now he has a beautiful, sweet wife and three rascally, kind, charming little boys that constantly steal my heart.

He loves his family unabashedly and God even more than that.

At (almost) 33 he’s trying to get into the police academy and become a police officer in their little city.

He makes me proud to be his sister.

For some reason he comes to mind today.  Those kids we were 15-20 years ago are long gone.  Today we are friends.  I like that.

Silent Murder

Imagine…

Sometime in the future the US Government – including the majority both sides of the political aisle / including the president, no matter republican/conservative or democrat/liberal all agreeing – decides that the US has an over population problem.  They institute a law that says you can only have one child.  If you already have children by law you cannot have any more.  What would you do?

Now say you or your wife gets pregnant.  You already have children which have been grandfathered into being protected against the consequences of breaking the law.  What do you do?  Do you have the child and hide it like Moses mother hid him?  Taking the risk of being found out and facing huge fines, you & your spouse jail time leaving your children to the care of family or worse government protection and sustainment?  What would you do if your have one child and it’s a girl unable to carry on your family name, unable to provide for you and your spouse later in life?  Do you place them in an orphanage and hope for the best?  Do you go against every moral, righteous cell in your being and have an abortion or place them in a dark corner unfed to slowly die.  Or abandon them in the back alley, drown them in a river/lake?

What would you do?

This scenario and these images are graphic.  We can’t imagine the US moving in this direction.  We can’t imagine that a parent would do this to their child (often the mother being the one to commit the act).  However, this very act – abandoning, killing an infant – goes on this very day in our world.

Infanticide is currently practiced in China, India, and Africa. In urban populaces gender-selective abortion is practiced.  Choosing male children, aborting females.

Infanticide and gender-selective abortion are not talked about.  Are not brought to light in the eye of the public.  We may be aware it happens but do we really know?  Do we know that infant girls are drowned in rivers because having a boy is preferred for status within community, because having a daughter means expensive dowries in the future.    Because a son (in rural areas) can work to support you when you are too old to do so yourself.

In a discussion with Shawn on Sunday we talked about this.  I said that the practice of infanticide makes me angry, pisses me off.  He commented that I don’t get this angry about abortion.  And I don’t.  Abortion takes a life that hasn’t been born, while infanticide murders (blatantly) a child that has taken breath – which according to critics for abortion say is when life starts.  Don’t get me wrong I think abortion is wrong, I don’t support it at all.  But I think in this day and age abortion is a tired topic.  People on both sides of the argument have grown tired of the fight while not budging in their stance.  But like I said in the previous paragraph it just isn’t talked about.

Infanticide is often illegal, but still practiced.  There needs to be a voice for these girls, these children.

For your reference here are some links with more information:

Wiki – Infanticide Selective-Sex Abortion

Gendercide.Org

Disciple The Nations Alliance Part 1Part 2

The Economist – The War on Baby Girls:  Gendercide

Update: I was turned onto these posts. Thanks to Elora.

Daily Mail – Gendercide 1 /   Gendercide 2

Defining Steadfastness

For the last few weeks I’ve been digging in repeatedly to James.  God is teaching me a lot and I’m trying to be a willing, flexible student.  Getting rid of sin and doing that 180 from where my heart started at isn’t always easy.  One thing I noticed on my last read through James was the repeated word steadfast.  It has also repeatedly come up in the chapters I’ve been reading in Pslams.

The dictionary defines steadfast:

stead·fast

1.  fixed in direction; steadily directed
2.  firm in purpose, resolution, faith, attachment, etc.
3.  unwavering, as resolution, faith, adherence, etc.
4.  firmly established, as an institution or a state of affairs.
5.  firmly fixed in place or position.
.
As I was finishing up my reading time last night I jotted down these attributes of the steadfast love of God.  How He has shown me how He defines steadfast:

♦  For those who have hope in Him – Psalm 33:22
♦  Neverending
♦  Abundant
♦  Without condition
♦  The earth is full there of – Psalm 33:5
♦  Unchanging
♦  Merciful
♦  Full of Grace
♦  Surrounding – Psalm 32:10
♦  Deep in redemption
♦  Forgiving

.

As I learn to be steadfast in my walk with Jesus not changing, to the right or to the left, I’m continually being reminded that He is steadfast, His love is steadfast.

Fearful of There

As much as I enjoy the freedom to go on Facebook and Twitter again there was a blessed solitude in not.  Quietness.  Peace.

I feel the need to ease back into them.  Not to immerse myself in the hustle and bustle of people I know and those I don’t.  It’s daunting.  Seeing all those unread tweets and updates.

The truth is I really don’t want to go back there.

To the place I was before, where I allowed these (in reality) stupid things to become ultimate in my life.  I cared more about what others were saying than what Jesus had to tell me.  Jesus doesn’t tweet, I have to go to the Bible to get His “updates”.

So, I’m fearful I’ll go back there.  To her.  I’m afraid at times to even open them up because I really don’t want to get sucked back in.

I don’t feel like I’m supposed to leave Facebook and/or Twitter.  I appreciate being able to connect/reconnect with friends via both.  To glean 140 (or less) characters of wisdom.  To know instantly that someone needs prayer and be able to lift them up at that moment.  I really just don’t want to go back there.

So I’m going at this slowly.  I hope to not be on as much as I used to be.  I plan also to take fasts from both in the future.  Just to make sure my heart is still aligned with where it SHOULD be.  If you don’t see me don’t worry.  DM or email me.  Check in on me.  Keep me accountable.

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