It came roaring at me two weeks ago with the earthquake in Haiti.  The images of poverty stricken, broken people floated before my eyes.  I didn’t close the websites or stop reading the Tweets because I wanted to look.

I wanted to be broken over these people.

Last Sunday at church God literally wrecked me.  Our pastor decided to forgo communion after the teaching and allow people to pray for Haiti while worship was led.  We watched this video done by Pastors Mark Driscoll & James McDonald who went to Haiti to help churches just days after the earthquake.  Within seconds of the video starting I was crying.  I hadn’t cried for Haiti yet.  All I could do the rest of the service was cry and plead to God to save:  spiritually and physically.

It isn’t just Haiti though.  It’s all children and families that are in devastating poverty.  That is what breaks my heart.  I want to argue with God and ask Him why are you allowing this to happen to your creation.  Why are you allowing the flesh and blood you wove together to be eaten away by diseases and malnutrition?

Today Shawn showed me pictures that Tony Morgan Tweeted from his trip to Burkina Faso through Compassion.  All I wanted to do besides cry for these children, was bring them into my home and take care of them.  Love them.

I know it isn’t an accident that God has placed these feelings in my heart.  I’ve pleaded with Him over and over to break my heart for the things that break His.  This is an answer to prayer.  Yet, I still feel so helpless.  We sponsor our precious, beautiful little Nikita in India and fully plan on sponsoring more in the future.  Yet, I still feel so helpless.  I pray.  We donate to Haiti, and yet…  I feel like there is so much more I could do and don’t know how or what.

I just want to be open to what He has for Shawn and I.  I guess my feeling helpless means I just lean on Him all that much more and He’ll be the work in me that moves my hands the way they need to be moved.

So I’m making an effort to weed “I’m starving” out of my vocabulary. It isn’t a healthy statement for me because I really am not starving. Thousands of people in desperate poverty are, I’m not.

For me it all started one night on my computer. At that time I was on MySpace and was browsing my friends pages. I started looking on Hillsong United’s page and their different friends. My heart broke. Here were people who are fighting daily for the poverty stricken, for those who are enslaved for sex trade, etc. And what was I doing? Sitting at home on my computer, in a nice home, living a cushy lifestyle.

Tonight I made a comment to Shawn about 9/11. He had a profound observation. He said that his mindset has changed regarding it. I asked in what way, and he said, “We memorialize and remember 3,000 people who died that day, but we do nothing to remember the 25,000 children die in poverty everyday because the common person and the government doesn’t care because they are just the least of these.” His observation caused me to stop and think. I recently heard a pastor say that we can’t have the gospel and not fight for social justice. Part of the Gospel is fighting for those who are down trodden, who can’t help themselves. I want to be someone who fights for these people. Who doesn’t forget the thousands upon thousands of people who die every day simple because they can’t get fresh water or medicine or mosquito nets.